THE SETUP
Cian and Andrew are returning from their first date.
Byron’s ghost went on the date as well, distracting both Cian, who could see Byron, and Andrew, who could not.
Andrew earlier had opened up about his past as a prostitute, the death of a fellow hustler and friend named Christopher, and how much it meant to Andrew back then that Cian gave him money but didn’t expect anything in return for it.
Andrew also listened sympathetically when Cian spoke of his continuing grief over the death of his unrequited love, Byron.
But Andrew has also been pretty adept at never mentioning Byron by name.
(A speech from this scene has also been posted as a monologue for Cian: “Touching Him in the Hospital”)
“Bury him. Or we don’t stand a chance.”
Emphasis shifts to CIAN and ANDREW, returning to CIAN’s stoop.
CIAN is talking nervously, avoiding ANDREW’s gaze but trying not to be obvious about it.
CIAN
When I finally got up the nerve to visit — Touching him for the first time in the hospital room. That was the hardest part of it. His parents — I walked in and we all re-introduced each other and then they wanted to go get something to eat. I mean, they weren’t being callous or anything — they really hadn’t eaten anything in a long time so I guess they needed to but they were really just trying to be nice and let me have some time alone with him — Anyway, they were going to go and I realized at that moment that the reason I was having an anxiety attack is that I really didn’t want to be alone in the room with him.
I’d never been near it before. Death. Dying. And death and Byron together, it was like he wasn’t even there. IT had taken over. And I didn’t want anything to do with it. So I just sat in the corner and stared at him lying there until someone else came in. The guy walked right up to the bed and whispered in Byron’s ear and started stroking his hair. So I guess I felt it was safe to approach and I walked up to stand on the other side of the bed. I never even knew the guy’s name. Never saw him again. Not even at the memorial service. After a minute or so, the guy wanted to give Byron a foot massage so he asked me to keep stroking Byron’s hair. Said it relaxed him, especially after those brain seizures he had the first night. I was going to beg off but there was no one else to do it and I didn’t want to look like I was repulsed or anything, which I guess I was, so I just reached out and did it.
ANDREW reaches over and takes CIAN’s hand.
CIAN (continued)
Sorry. Weird courting rituals. Talking about dead people.
ANDREW
If you were just like everybody else, I never would have noticed you.
CIAN
After that, though, it was easy — like he became Byron for me again. But his parents — I mean, I know they were doing the best they could but there were times they drove me nuts. It wasn’t my place to say anything, I know — I mean, who am I to judge? I couldn’t even touch the guy. And they were always there, taking shifts, using that suction thing to vacuum the excess saliva out of his mouth, going through his date book and canceling his dentist appointment, making the — arrangements — But all the same, sometimes the conversations in that room were just so bizarre. He was the reason we were all in that room but they wouldn’t talk to him.
ANDREW brings CIAN’s hand to his mouth and kisses it.
CIAN continues to talk between the kisses, on a roll he can’t quite stop.
CIAN (continued)
They’d talk at him. Or worse they’d ignore him.
ANDREW kisses CIAN on the lips.
CIAN (continued)
Talk around him, over him —
Another kiss.
CIAN (continued)
— about everything except him. Like he was furniture or something.
Another.
CIAN (continued)
Wow.
This time CIAN kisses ANDREW, for a long time.
ANDREW
Wow to you, too.
CIAN
Punch me.
ANDREW punches him in the arm.
CIAN (continued)
Ow.
ANDREW
Still here.
CIAN
Thank God.
ANDREW
People die all the time, ya know.
CIAN
Huh?
ANDREW
Like lightning. They say it strikes somewhere on earth ten times every second. People are always dying.
CIAN
What the — ?
ANDREW
Lot of ’em die young, too. It happens.
CIAN
Why are you — ?
ANDREW
I mean, I visited someone — Christopher — his grave — just this morning. I could be visiting a whole graveyard full of dead friends, if anyone had cared enough to bother burying them.
CIAN
What’s your point?
ANDREW
People die. This guy died two years ago.
CIAN
Not two years yet.
ANDREW
OK, OK, one year, ten months — what time is it? –twenty-seven days, three hours and some change, right? The guy’s gone. He’s not coming back. Elvis has left the building!
CIAN
Byron! “The guy” has a name. His name is Byron.
ANDREW
Was. His name was Byron. My name is Andrew.
Byron died. Christopher died. We’re both still alive. Let’s start acting like it. He was just a friend.
CIAN
What difference does that make? I love him.
ANDREW
Jesus. Dead two years — you still use the present tense when you talk about him.
CIAN
Not all the time.
ANDREW
Just when you talk about how you feel about him. Still feel about him.
CIAN
Love isn’t as easy to kill off as people.
ANDREW
Dating a fuckin’ Hallmark card.
CIAN
I’m not going to apologize for feeling. Feeling is what made me stop and talk to a prostitute and treat him like a real person.
ANDREW
Like a real person?
CIAN
I mean —
ANDREW
Like if you hadn’t bothered, I wouldn’t have been a person? Since you never met Christopher, that mean he was never a “real person”? I’m not some stray dog. I cleaned up without any help from you.
CIAN
I wasn’t saying —
ANDREW
And death? I’ve been there. Nothing romantic about death.
Most of us don’t get pretty little deathbed vigils. You know someone. One day they just aren’t there anymore. Just gone. No warning, no explanation. You find out later, if you find out at all.
If anything I should probably be more hung up on Christopher than you have any right to be about Byron.
CIAN
What the — ?
ANDREW
He was never your boyfriend. Christ, the two of you never even fucked.
CIAN
Well, leave it to you to reduce it to that.
(PAUSE.)
ANDREW
I love you, but you don’t see me.
If you’d rather see someone who isn’t there — fine.
Can’t fight you on this one. Can’t get inside your skull the way he does unless you let me.
ANDREW digs some money out of his pockets and holds it out to CIAN.
CIAN
What’s that?
ANDREW
Twenty-eight bucks. I pay my debts.
CIAN
I don’t want your money.
ANDREW throws the money at CIAN’s feet.
ANDREW
We’re even.
CIAN
Andrew, please —
ANDREW
Bury him.
Or we don’t stand a chance.
ANDREW walks off into the dark, leaving CIAN alone.
(photo: 1997-1998 production by The Subterranean Theatre Company (Los Angeles, CA); l-r, Doug Sutherland as Cian, Mark Vanslow as Byron, and Jason Farmer as Andrew)
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