THE SETUP
Vincent’s best friend Byron died almost two years ago, but Vincent is still haunted by memories of his helplessness in the face of Byron’s illness, and personally adrift without his childhood friend to speak with anymore.
While Vincent’s gay brother Cian is haunted by Byron’s ghost, still his unrequited love, Vincent is left with only fading memories.
Cian also has the frequent company of Vincent’s girlfriend Gabby, as she tries to get Cian out of the house more, to the movies if nothing else.
Cian’s support system, both living and dead, plus the fact Gabby still has faith in God in spite of Byron’s death at 32 years old, has pushed Vincent to a breaking point.
Sound of a plane flying over as the hospital bed re-emerges from the dark.
BYRON lies in the hospital bed, VINCENT sits in the chair beside it.
After a moment, VINCENT gets out of the chair and down on his knees next to the hospital bed.
He bows his head.
After a moment, he looks up.
“God let him die.”
VINCENT
Please.
GABBY appears in a pool of light by her kitchen table. Her mother’s Bible is on the table.
GABBY
When Byron was in the hospital, every time he was in the hospital, you prayed. You admitted it. I even saw you once.
VINCENT rises and joins GABBY.
BYRON and the hospital bed fade away into the darkness.
Throughout the following discussion, VINCENT alternately paces, looks at his watch, pulls at his clothes — harder and harder for GABBY to pin down.
VINCENT
Well, obviously there was a communication breakdown that last time, huh.
GABBY
So if you weren’t praying to God, some higher power, who or what were you trying to talk to?
VINCENT
Is this the part where the clay boy and his dog give us a simple moral lesson about how to live a good and virtuous life? —
(imitates Goliath, the dog from “Davey and Goliath”)
“Duh, gee Davey, what’d we learn about the Lord Jesus today?”
GABBY
What I believe doesn’t make me a mindless twit any more than what you don’t believe —
VINCENT
— makes me a godless heretic? Any more than, say, what Cian and Byron do in the dark condemns them to burn in hell?
GABBY
Is that what you’re afraid of? Why do you have to believe the worst?
VINCENT
God let him die.
GABBY
Oh, Vince. No —
VINCENT
Give me one good reason. You’re too smart for all this.
GABBY
Don’t you think I know that? Don’t think for a minute it’s easy for me, because it’s not. I don’t shut off my brain for a couple of hours every Sunday just because I step into a church. I’ve got my eyes wide open.
VINCENT
Me, too.
GABBY
What do you see?
VINCENT
What about Cian and the things he sees?
GABBY
Right now all he has room for is faith in the dead. Same with you. It’s all about Byron and what happened to you and what you lost. Faith in the living’s hard to come by. But you want a reason to believe? Start focusing on your brother. Focus on me. Focus on the people around you who are still alive, while we’re still here.
VINCENT
It’s not that easy.
GABBY
I lost him, too, remember.
VINCENT
You didn’t lose what I lost.
GABBY
OK, so I didn’t lose a friend I’d known since kindergarten, someone who slept over in high school discussing the finer points of why the word “cunt” bothers girls so much, someone to play basketball with at two in the morning. You think that means it hurts any less?
VINCENT
Well, this is a welcome change.
GABBY
From what?
VINCENT
From you obsessing about Cian. Maybe if you’d spend a little less time worrying about my little brother and a little more time —
GABBY
What? Worrying about you? Why? So you can throw it back in my face?
VINCENT
I don’t do that.
GABBY
Bullshit. At least Cian needs me.
VINCENT
I need you.
GABBY
Then act like it.
VINCENT
So it’s easier to dote on my gay brother?
GABBY
You should be glad I’m fixating on Cian. At least he’s not going to take advantage of the situation.
VINCENT
Not for lack of you giving him opportunity.
GABBY
Look, I’d prefer he’d find some nice guy to go to the movies with instead, too. But I’m not going to let him turn into a hermit.
VINCENT
Well maybe being a hermit’s safer. At least he won’t catch anything. Unless he already has.
GABBY
Cian’s been tested, Vince. You know that. He’s clean. He’s negative.
VINCENT
Yeah, well people used to think AZT was great, too.
I do my homework. They say HIV may not even be the true cause. It might be Human Herpes Virus 6 which is probably just African Swine Fever Virus mislabeled. But it doesn’t really matter, does it? Whatever did it, Byron’s just as dead. No one’s going to say, “Oops, wrong diagnosis, death is forfeit, you get to have him back.” Just means they’re looking in the wrong place. And we’re supposed to be grateful they’re looking at all. Meantime, if it’s true, then the test is useless and we’re all dancing in a minefield. So don’t go telling me my little brother is HIV negative and expect that to make me feel better.
GABBY
Byron gave me fair warning about you, you know. But I went ahead anyway, ready for it all to fall apart on a moment’s notice. I kept watching for the signs and here they are.
VINCENT
What signs? There are no “signs”.
BYRON suddenly wanders in from the darkness, standing near GABBY. As GABBY and BYRON trade off phrases, it is as if each of them continues talking uninterrupted throughout.
BYRON
Oh come on —
GABBY
Of course there are signs.
BYRON
You pull at your clothes like they’re always too tight.
GABBY
And you never sit still and there’s never enough space to move —
BYRON
— room’s always too small.
GABBY
And there’s never enough time in the day suddenly.
BYRON
And that’s how I know her days are numbered —
GABBY
— that’s how I know it’s coming.
VINCENT goes to GABBY and kisses her.
BYRON disappears into the darkness.
A startled GABBY takes a moment to break off the unexpected kiss.
GABBY (continued)
What the heck was that for?
VINCENT just looks at her.
GABBY (continued)
Oh my God. I said something Byron said, didn’t I? Is that it?
VINCENT doesn’t respond.
GABBY (continued)
You’ve got to help me out here. How do I fight someone who no longer technically exists? I mean, I loved him, too, but there are limits. He’s been dead nearly two years and he’s still running our lives. How the hell does a person do that? And why do we let him? Be honest with me for a minute, please. When you’re with me, when we’re — together — when you close your eyes, who do you see?
VINCENT
Fuck you.
VINCENT sees the Bible on the table, goes and grabs it.
VINCENT (continued)
And fuck God.
VINCENT throws her mother’s Bible at GABBY’s feet.
GABBY, stunned, kneels to pick it up, unable to look at him.
VINCENT, contrite, attempts to approach her.
GABBY speaks without looking at him.
GABBY (quietly)
Get out.
VINCENT leaves.
(photo: 1997-1998 production by The Subterranean Theatre Company (Los Angeles, CA); l-r, Tom Sonnek as Vincent, and Tania Gutsche as Gabby)
Leave a Reply